Sorry, It's Been A Few!

So I decided that since a few of you do read this and like to know whats going on in my life, I'll keep updating! Thanks for the words of encouragement everyone!! I had a super busy weekend. It was Beth and Sarah's birthday's. Beth's 20th and Sarah's 21st. Friday night I babysat, Saturday I went job hunting, and Sunday I don't even remember all that went on, I was THAT busy. I do remember that Mine and Beth's male cheerleading squad took 2nd place in the Homecoming competition! We were really excited and proud of the guys for their efforts!!! Especially considering His House has never once placed in the cheerleading comp...ever! How cool!! I was so excited. School is going well...or at least I think it is. I am really trying this semester and working to apply myself. I know that I am smart, and I know that I can do this stuff..I just have to learn to apply myself. So that has been on my list of things to do! I skipped class today, well not actually skipped it, but well I was up and freezing....so I laid back down to cover up with my blankets, and slept through my class! Darn those warm, comfortable beds!!! Oh well, I can get the notes from someone else! I do have to email the girls from my group in order to get the stuff from our lab that we were going to go over today! Ooops! Now to a much deeper subject. Since I have been trying so hard to do well in school, some other things have been suffering! My relationships with people are starting to suffer, and that makes me sad. First of all, Beth and I hardly ever get to hang out anymore because we are both so busy with school. I mean its sad that we live two feet from each other and we can't even hang out! We need to start making time! Another relationship that is suffering, is the one with my parents. I guess it really isn't suffering, but now that I live closer to them, I'm really starting to miss them. I miss not seeing them all the time. I need to get over there more and visit with them a little bit! Most importantly though, my relationship with God is suffering. I have been working and working so hard to build up the relationship with him to get to know him better. I just get so busy, that sometimes I just forget to pray or even read my bible. Two of the most important things are the things that I happen to leave out. My friends don't help much. Like don't get me wrong I love them to death...but sometimes they don't help me. I tend to slip up more when I'm around them. I need people to start holding me accountable. I want to have a good, strong, close relationship with God and I can't do that if everyday I take a few steps back! I don't know, maybe it's just me. We'll see, I'm going to start making that my top priority! I don't really know if any of that really made much sense. But oh well....I need to get going. I have to go jump in the shower and then take some apps back! Feel free to comment!!! Much Love!!!!!

Don't Know Why I Bother.

I haven't been very faithful about udating this thing. I don't know why I continue to keep it, it's not like anyone actually reads it. And if anyone actually does read it, they don't let me know by leaving comments and such. Anywho, not much has changed in my life in the past few weeks. Still in school and still unemployed. The money is just about gone and I need a job desperately. I have filled out numerous applications already and I have 3 more sitting on the table downstairs waiting to be returned. I should have probably taken them back as soon as I got them filled out, but who knows. I'll have plenty of time to do it tomorrow, and besides they start getting busy in like 30 minutes. So I'll do it tomorrow afternoon when there wont be anyone in there. Sounds good to me!!! My trip to the UP was a lot of fun. I was thinking about it last night, and I would really like to go back. Maybe in the spring or something Beth and I could fit in a trip to go back and see it in the spring. Do some more fun stuff, go see all these places people were telling us about! That would be awesome! I'm DOWN! I for once don't have any prospects lined up in the guy department. Usually there is someone that I usually have a crush on, or at least think is cute, but for once, there isn't anyone. I'm ok with that. I don't need a guy right now. Especially with school and with a job, I just won't have time for a boyfriend. I would feel like I was neglecting something, and it would either be him or my school work....chances are it would be my school work and that is really something I can't afford right now. I had two tests this week. One in Biology and one in Chemistry. I got an 83 on the bio and an 84 on the Chem. I was excited. Those are not bad grades. Not to mention we have like 5 other tests so I have time to study more and get better grades on all the tests! I am working my butt off this year in order to get good grades. This will be the first time I've ever been serious about school! I can't wait to see my GPA at the end of the semester!!!!! I saw Josh today and yesterday. Yesterday I just saw him driving, so that wasn't bad, but today I actually saw him, face to face, and we spoke. Well all we said was hi...but still. Talk about weird feelings. I mean how are you supposed to act towards the ex who is now dating what used to be your best friend? I am going to be nice to him whenever I see him, I mean after all...I did break up with him...and she should have known better! Thankfully, she doesn't go here so I won't have to see them together! That is nice! But whatever! I'm going to go find something productive to do!!! LEAVE COMMENTS PEOPLE!!!! until next time...Over and out!

WOO WOO

Michigan Tech here we come. Beth and I are taking a road trip to the UP to see some people we know. There is nothing like being stuck in the care for 8 hours with your best friend! Hahaha. Anyway, she was told that the scenery is really beautiful so that should be cool, I think maybe on Sunday on the way home we are going to stop and take some pictures. I'm excited!!!
On another note, Friday my sister has to go see a surgeon. Please keep her in your prayers. On monday she found out that she has cervical cancer, and if the surgeon decides to, she is going to have surgery on Friday. So please keep her and our entire family in your prayers.
Im out, I have to finish getting ready and then run some errands. PEACE OUT!!!!

Questions....

I am full of all kinds of questions today. But before I start in on them...I just want to make it a known fact that my Math prof is the most boring man you will ever meet! Today it took everything I had at 8:30 in the morning to not fall asleep listening to him talk about mean, median and mode. I felt like I was back in the second grade. Anyway, on to the questions that are running through my mind...:
1. Why isn't my chemistry book here yet? I ordered it well over a week ago and it still has not shown up. It makes me really irritated especially considering my math book was confirmed two days after my chemistry book and it showed up days ago. I really kind of need my Chem book ASAP because well quite frankly, I have yet to look at it and I have a test a week from Wednesday. So they either need to refund me my money or get me my book!
2. Why on earth are there a huge swarm of bees or wasps or whatever they are flying around outside of Beth's window? I'm not even sure where to start with that one. I guess they probably have a nest in the wall or something, who knows....wouldn't surprise me.
3. Why is it that we always end up liking someone we know whe should not? I asked Beth this question last night, and she said she often wondered the same thing. It ineveitable...it really is. No matter what, we always end up liking someone we know isn't good for us. It happens to some of us more frequently than others but, hey what can you do?
4. Why is it that just as soon as you don't really care about trying to get the guy anymore, they start calling you? I got a call today from someone and granted it was all for personal reasons, but part of it was. And the person reasons came before the business reasons. Maybe thats a good sign. I don't really know, but that is a really frustrating habit that guys really need to break.
5. Why on Earth did I ever sign up for a 7-10 English class? I know how I am and I know that when that time comes around every Monday night, it's going to be the worst part of my day!!! It's kind of poopy, but I guess since it is only once a week, that kind of makes up for it!
So those are the main questions I have running through my head right now. On a good note though, the doctors office called me today, or actually they called on Friday but by the time I got the message they were already closed, so I called them back today. Anyway, I have an appointment with the Surgeon on Nov. 10. I am kind of excited but nervous at the same time. It is kind of late for the time span I was aiming. But we'll see, maybe it will work out after all. Keep that in your prayers, if you would. Even if you don't know what I'm talking about, just pray that it would all work out as planned. Anyway, I'm gonna go for now, so Until next time...Over and out!

Tired

I don't know what to feel. I went to the doctor on Thursday and the reason I went in was to get my headaches checked out and to talk to him about having some surgery done. Well when I left I had two percriptions and a referral to see a surgeon. I am excited about talking to the surgeon, even though I don't know that the whole surgery is going to be paid for by my insurance company. I really really hope that it is, because to me it's a necessity. It's not something I want to have done just because, it's something that needs to be taken care of. Anyway, I started taking my perscriptions today and it says on the bottle that it could cause drowsiness, but I didn't think it would be to this extent. I am going to try and make it through the day without taking a nap, but we'll see how that goes. I hope this stuff works without causing any other problems.
On to another subject, it's been a while since I've talked about him, but for some reason today I feel the urge to bring him up. I talked to Wes the other day. It was only for a minute or two but still. I can honestly say that I am working to get over the situation. I am trying to put it behind me, and now that I look back on it, I honestly believe that I knew from the beginning it wasn't going to work. Maybe I didn't, but I would like to think that I did. I don't know if I ever really believed that I could change him. I am beginning to realize that the reasons I clung to him so much were selfish. It felt good to have somebody to cuddle up to once in a while and to have there to kiss if you needed it. I know that isn't healthy, to be with someone (not that we were actually ever together, he doesn't believe in titles) for those reasons, but thats what happened. I do care about him, and a part of me always will. We did spend a large majority of our summers together, and you don't spend that amount of time with someone and not develop some sort of feelings for them. I know that somewhere deep down within him somewhere, there are feelings for me. Whether they are platonic, or more than that, I'll never know but I believe that they are there. I am just sad that things are the way they are now. We don't even talk anymore, but I think that is better for me. I realize that God is always testing my strength and courage, and that he will not ever give me something that I can not handle. So for every hurdle that gets set in my path, I need to turn to Him for His guidance and praise him just as much I do for every blessing in my life. GOD IS GOOD!!!!
But I think that is all for now, I am going to go look at my math book some more and hopefully understand Statistics a little bit better before class tomorrow. Until next time...Over and out!

You Make Me Sick

Have you ever just been so sick of someone and the way they act? Tonight I realized that this one person make me sick. He is so gross and loathsome. He acts like he is the coolest person on this earth and the fact that he is more irresponsible than I am makes it even worse. I suppose you would have to know who I am talking about to understand. And even then I'm not sure you would understand completely. I don't think anyone could understand it. Not even Beth. So many things have gone on and been done that I just can't even believe him sometimes. I guess if I'm saying this about him I probably should say it about myself, but I don't think I'm like that all the time. Anyway, moving on... so today Troy from His House informed me that he had hired someone else to be the secretary for His House, which at first I was cool with and I guess I still am because honestly, it was only 10 hours a week. I need more than that. But the lame excuse he gave me for it was what kind of makes me mad. He told me pretty much that the reason he gave the other girl the job was because she had been involved in His House longer. None of our qualifications mattered, but because she was there longer she got the job. I think its kind of bull but whatever like I said, it was only 10 hours a week! Today just wasn't a very good day at all. Oh well, Tomorrow night I'm going to state and I couldn't be more excited. I can not wait to see everyone. I miss them all like crazy. I have a doctors apt at 3:45 tomorrow too, I am kind of nervous. But I hope he can do something about these headaches I've been getting. They are AWFUL! We'll see what he says. Maybe he will agree with me on everything and my plan will be in progress! I hope so, please pray that I make the right decision. I'm not sure what to do really. But this is what I want! Anyway, I think I'm going to go for now. Until next time....Over and out!

These headaches have got to go. That is all I have to say. Maybe when I go to the doctor on Thursday he will be able to do something for me. I am sick of waking up with such awful headaches that I can't even get out of bed in the morning. I'm starting to feel like an invalid. Seriously, I missed my Math class this morning because I couldn't even open my eyes. My head hurt so bad and I was so sensitive to the light that every time I opened my eyes I felt like I was going to throw up. MIGRAINES SUCK! I took some medicine for it, and now I think it's stuck in my throat. It's really awful. I need to get ready and head out to the college. I have a while before my class starts but I want to go to the bookstore and get my bio book and stuff like that before tomorrow. Eh, I have two hours before class starts. I'll finish this, check my mail and then head out there! Well I just wanted to write about it! PEACE OUT!

I HATE THEM!

These headaches have got to go. That is all I have to say. Maybe when I go to the doctor on Thursday he will be able to do something for me. I am sick of waking up with such awful headaches that I can't even get out of bed in the morning. I'm starting to feel like an invalid. Seriously, I missed my Math class this morning because I couldn't even open my eyes. My head hurt so bad and I was so sensitive to the light that every time I opened my eyes I felt like I was going to throw up. MIGRAINES SUCK! I took some medicine for it, and now I think it's stuck in my throat. It's really awful. I need to get ready and head out to the college. I have a while before my class starts but I want to go to the bookstore and get my bio book and stuff like that before tomorrow. Eh, I have two hours before class starts. I'll finish this, check my mail and then head out there! Well I just wanted to write about it! PEACE OUT!

I'm Sad.

So it finally hit me on my way home tonight that I am no longer employed. Not only that, but I won't see any of the people who have become my friends over the summer. Two in particular. Daren and Martha have become to of my closest friends over the summer and I'm going to miss them. We spent the entire day working together, and then after we went out and got pizza on Daren. He owed us, considering we worked our butts off helping him get everything taken down and cleaned for the end of the season. I had to walk through muck up to my ankles so that I could mark where the big bouy's went. It was by far the most disgusting thing I've done in a long, long time. But anyway, I don't know about things right now. I was kind of excited for the end of the season becuase I thought things with Daren would go somewhere, but now I don't know if they really will or not. He didn't seem to taken aback by it as I was. But I guess I don't really care, if it was supposed to be, it will work out. If not, than whatever I'll find someone better suited for me. I don't know I just kind of said a quick and lame goodbye to the two of them and jumped in my car and came home. Usually I would have hung around for a while and talked to Daren, but not tonight. It just didn't seem right. I dont know why. Who knows. He looked good today. I think it was the tan and his eyes. I'm not sure. I think I'm delirious from all the sun I got today. I don't know. I'm going to the doctors on Thursday this could be the start of something really GREAT! I can not wait. I'm a little bit nervous though at the same time! We'll see how it goes. I have a busy schedule tomorrow. Class all day then a hair appointment at 3, then it's off to youth group at 6:30. Then I have class on thursday, followed by a doc appointment at 3:45 then it's off to state for THursday and Friday nights. Should be good! Until next time...Over and out!

BLAH!!!

I am so bored. I need to do my English homework. But right now I have no motivation to do it. I need to get motivated. Maybe Beth can motivate me...she needs to hound me to do it! I need to hound myself to do it. I got out of work early today, and I bought Daren lunch. Then I came home and instead of going to the concert, Beth and I stayed home. OH well..I had my chance, but I just didn't feel like going. I wasn't realy that excited about it. OH well. I don't think I've really thought about the fact that I am no longer working at the park. Well tomorrow is my last day but, none of the seasonal employees will be there. Just me, Daren, Martha, and maybe Darwin. It will be fun though. I am excited. Don't really know why. This weekend has gone on forever and it's still not over. I still have one more day of vacation. HAHA YESSSS!!!!! But thats all for now! I think I'm going to go! Until next time. Over and Out!

Ho Hum!

Just got home a little bit ago from Church and Sunday Dinner with the adopted family. I was going to go up north but my mom called me this morning and told me that Ron wasn't feeling well and that they weren't going. And I didn't really want to go up by myself and sit there all day with my grandparents, not that it is a bad thing...but you know..it might get kind of boring. So I'm staying home and going to cell group like normal Sunday evenings. I haven't been in a long time and it should be good fun! Anyway, my first week of classes went well. They should be fairly easy and I shouldn't have to much of a problem with them. WE'll see how everything works out. My ultimate goal, I think with everyone else on campus, is to end up with a 4.0 at the end of the semester. I am going to work my hardest and see how things go. I have the potential, I know I do. I talked to Bryce and Lou on Friday. It made me sad. I miss them so much. Not to mention they put me on a freaking guilt trip about not coming back to State. I'm getting past it though. It's going to be different, but this is totally God's will and I am ok with that. So whatever. OH MY GOSH....I watched The Passion last night. WOW~!!!!! Seriously, I don't think I have been moved more powerfully by any movie, which isn't surprising! I think I cried through the entire movie!!! WOW it was good. I can't even explain it. If you haven't seen it yet, YOU NEED TO RENT IT!!! ANyway, I was reading Paige's journal and I found this...so I thought I would add it to mine. I'm sure she wouldn't mind. Anyway, here it is!

Love Is …
… asking about someone's day and truly caring about the answer.
… knowing that people are different and loving them just the same.
… being there.
… taking out the trash without being asked.
… leaving the last pop for your brother, even though you've been craving it all day.
… being patient, even when you're tired—especially when you're tired.
… writing a note of encouragement.
… treating your family as well as you treat your friends.
… getting up early to do someone else's job for him.
… buying someone flowers for no reason.
… listening to a friend, even when you've heard the same thing a hundred times.
… calling someone back after an argument.
… being honest about how you feel.
… caring—even when it's hard and you don't feel like it.
… trusting in someone even when you're scared.
… saying you're sorry when you are wrong.
… listening and giving advice—and knowing the difference between the two.
… smiling in hard times.
… calling just to say hi on a busy day.
… praying for someone.
… forgiving someone again and again.
… walking beside someone, not in front of or behind her.
… believing.
… being comfortable with someone in silence.
… being a person to joke with.
… providing a shoulder to cry on.
… being a friend.
… difficult.
… accepting people like a little child does.
… surprising someone.
… offering a new perspective on life.
… serving someone breakfast in bed.
… holding your tongue.
… not changing the radio station when someone is listening to it.
… gently admonishing.
… working on the things you know bother someone else.
… trying to understand.
… sacrificial.
… being open to correction.
… ignoring another's faults.
… humble.
… serving others.
… changing your plans for someone.
… crying for someone when you know they're hurting.
… what God does for us

But I think thats it for nwo. I'm going to head out. Until next time....over and out!

I wanted you to know, I love the way you laugh...

It's been a long week thus far and it's only hump day! But my week, unlike some, does get easier. I only have two classes tomorrow and work, and then I'm done until saturday with both classes and work. Well after tomorrow, I'm done with classes until Tuesday. Which gives me something to look forward to! Im content with that. Heck, I'm content with not having Friday classes.
I'm almost done with work....which is good. No work = less stress, less stress = a happier, more content Michelle. I am excited for work to be done, but at the same time, I'm really sad that it's over. All of my friends except for Beth are from work. So I mean, thats closing another book of friends. I guess that just means that God has a lot of friends for me to meet at SVSU! We'll see.
Today at work was a little awkward. Martha has been having a lot of problems lately with her ex and the baby. So she got this phone call at work today and she was freaking out. I don't know how to handle situations like that. I have no experience with that, well not directly. I mean I experienced it from her son's perspective but other than that, I'm clueless. I know that situations like this are the hardest on the child. So I asked my mom about it all, because I know she went through it all. Then I told Martha what she said, and I think that maybe I helped in some way. Maybe...maybe not. But I tried, I did my best with the situation. I don't really know why everyone comes to me with their problems. I can't fix them...I can give them my advice on what to do with the situation...but I can't solve anything. I mean it does make me feel really good that people trust me enough to open up to me with their problems...but still...it gets kind of frustrating sometimes. I'm always willing to listen, I think that's one of my best qualities is that I am always willing to listen to someone. I don't mind providing a shoulder to cry on. I just hope that the people who use my shoulder as a snot rag will be there for me when I need them. For the most part they are. Especially Martha. We talk a lot! It's cool. I just wanted to vent about that a little bit.
I'm home alone. I did'nt go to youth group tonight. I just was run down and wanted some time to myself. Ya know, once in a while you need that kind of thing. But now that I've been here for a while, I wish that Beth would come home. Haha...it's kind of lonely here by myself!
I talked to Jen Keates tonight. I miss everyone at State so much. But I know this is better for me. So it's cool! I'll get past it after a while! Classes are going well. Well so far anyway, it is only the third day of classes. My Math prof is a little bit weird, but I think I can handle it. I know three people in that class. So I guess if I ever need help, I know where I can get it. My chemistry prof seems to be really good. We'll see, hes the Dean of the College of Engineering. So he is definitely a smart man. My bio prof is really cool to, Beth loved her so I'm going to assume that she is good! We'll see. I am excited. I am going to do well this semester even if it kills me!!!
I talked to Wes the other night. I miss him. Things aren't the same. I don't know. It's weird....but I knew it would end sometimes I guess. Maybe I didn't want it to!! I don't know whats going on. I miss him though! I think thats enough writing for now. Until Next time...Over and out!