Tired

I don't know what to feel. I went to the doctor on Thursday and the reason I went in was to get my headaches checked out and to talk to him about having some surgery done. Well when I left I had two percriptions and a referral to see a surgeon. I am excited about talking to the surgeon, even though I don't know that the whole surgery is going to be paid for by my insurance company. I really really hope that it is, because to me it's a necessity. It's not something I want to have done just because, it's something that needs to be taken care of. Anyway, I started taking my perscriptions today and it says on the bottle that it could cause drowsiness, but I didn't think it would be to this extent. I am going to try and make it through the day without taking a nap, but we'll see how that goes. I hope this stuff works without causing any other problems.
On to another subject, it's been a while since I've talked about him, but for some reason today I feel the urge to bring him up. I talked to Wes the other day. It was only for a minute or two but still. I can honestly say that I am working to get over the situation. I am trying to put it behind me, and now that I look back on it, I honestly believe that I knew from the beginning it wasn't going to work. Maybe I didn't, but I would like to think that I did. I don't know if I ever really believed that I could change him. I am beginning to realize that the reasons I clung to him so much were selfish. It felt good to have somebody to cuddle up to once in a while and to have there to kiss if you needed it. I know that isn't healthy, to be with someone (not that we were actually ever together, he doesn't believe in titles) for those reasons, but thats what happened. I do care about him, and a part of me always will. We did spend a large majority of our summers together, and you don't spend that amount of time with someone and not develop some sort of feelings for them. I know that somewhere deep down within him somewhere, there are feelings for me. Whether they are platonic, or more than that, I'll never know but I believe that they are there. I am just sad that things are the way they are now. We don't even talk anymore, but I think that is better for me. I realize that God is always testing my strength and courage, and that he will not ever give me something that I can not handle. So for every hurdle that gets set in my path, I need to turn to Him for His guidance and praise him just as much I do for every blessing in my life. GOD IS GOOD!!!!
But I think that is all for now, I am going to go look at my math book some more and hopefully understand Statistics a little bit better before class tomorrow. Until next time...Over and out!